Pick Up Lines of James and Sirius
by Unbeatable Beaters
Summary: Ever thought what pick up lines they used? Here are they. Three-shots
1. Chapter 1

**All the credits of these pick up lines go to Allysah Lemaire who posted it on Tumblr**

**If you want the link, It's on my profile.**

**Hope you like it, and there will be more 2 chapters ;)**

**xoxox**

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**Lily's POV**

_Monday_

"Oi! Evans!" I heard from down the corridor.

"What do you want, Potter?" I turned and looked at him murderous. By that time I already could tell which voice was his without much effort.

After 5 years of being chased by him, it's not that hard.

"I just wanted to know a tiny thing." He said getting closer to me.

I rolled my eyes and went "It's never a tiny thing when it's you, Potter."

He smiled.

"Did you survive Avada Kedavra?"

I looked at him as if he were some kind of freak. Which I bet he is, by the way.

"Why do you want to know that, Potter? Isn't the answer obvious?" I said starting to walk again.

"Cuz you're drop dead gorgeous!" He shouted from where he was and all I could do was pretend that I didn't hear it and keep walking.

* * *

**Sirius' POV**

_Tuesday_

Being Sirius Black is awesome.

All the girls wanting to be with me... I just can't get enough of it.

Well, sometimes I do get slapped, but there's always a reward after all that.

"Hey Sirius" said a fifth year passing by me, all giggly.

I smiled and winked at her.

I can't recall her name, but she was damn hot. And I guess that's why I found myself going behind her.

Five minutes later, I already had a date tonight on top of the Astronomy tower.

She giggled again.

"I'll look forward tonight." She said smiling and biting her lower lip.

I winked. "Hagrid's not the only giant on campus, if you know what I mean" and walked away.

* * *

**James' POV**

_Wednesday_

I was walking down the halls of the school in the middle of the night, just to keep a habit of it.

Filch almost got me twice, due the fact that Remus hid the Marauders' Map so we wouldn't go out in the dead of the night. My guess is that he forgot I have an Invisibility Cloak.

So, as I was walking, I kept thinking (because despite what Evans says, I think, okay?) why on hell did Minnie give me a detention? It wasn't me who wrote perverted things on my homework. **This time!**

I was so into my thoughts that I noticed too late someone coming my direction, didn't have time to divert my way and bumped into Lily.

"Potter, I know it's you." She said looking at where I was. How she knew, I had no idea. "It's not a secret that you have an Invisibility Cloak, you know?" She completed.

Oh, so that's how she knows. Got it.

"Lumos!" She said.

I took off the Cloak.

"Okay, no need to shove this light on my face!" I said when she approached her wand of my face.

"It's nothing, Potter. Lumos Maxima!" And shoved the wand in my face even more.

I closed my eyes.

"You know, Lily, you don't need to say Lumos Maxima to turn me on. You already do it by being by my side."

Then she slapped me across the face and walked away.


	2. Chapter 2

**Remus' POV**

_Hogsmeade_

It was supposed to be another weekend in Hogsmeade, where nothing weird would happen. Again, it was _supposed _to be like that.

Sirius had had too many doses of firewhiskey, so he was acting like an idiot. More than his usual behavior.

"Come on, Padfoot, you've had too many." James said trying to get him out of the Three Broomsticks. "I guess it's time for you to go back and take a cold shower."

"Prooongsss..." He started saying. "I love you, mate!"

"Yeah, I love you too, dude, now let's get going."

"James, Remus, take care of him, ok?" Madam Rosmerta said coming from behind the bar.

"Don't worry." I said trying not to laugh. "He does that all the time."

"Madam Rosmerta!" Sirius said in his entire drunk attitude. "You look pretty hot today." I eyed James suspiciously. This was not going to end well. "You know what?" He completed coming closer to her and trying to whisper, but totally failing. "I'd like to get my basilisk into your chamber of secrets."

And that's when Madam Rosmerta kicked us out of there, almost hexing us into obliviation.

* * *

**James' POV**

_6__th__ year_

"POTTER!" I heard Lily screaming from the Common Room. And the only thing that came to my mind was that she found out the little gift I left for that jerk Diggory.

I went down the stairs in such a good mood.

"You called me, Lily?" I asked nonchalantly.

"You are such an arse!" She stated point her wand at me.

"Whoa, what's the matter?" I asked putting my hands up, in a fake surrender.

"That poor boy didn't even see what was coming over him!" She said getting redder and closer to me, looking pissed off.

"Well, next time, he won't go and drool all over you." I answered shrugging.

"We're not together, Potter. When will you accept it?" She threw her arms in the air, looking tired of telling me that so many times.

"We're not together _yet_, Lily."

"You act like a criminal, you know that?" She asked me starting to walk away.

"I don't think I catch what you're trying to say. Care to enlighten me?"

"Hexing the others for nothing. That's what I mean."

"In that case, Evans, I wish you were a Dementor."

"Excuse me?" She looked confused.

"If you were a Dementor, I'd become a criminal to get your kiss." I said and winked at her, leaving before she could do anything else to me.

* * *

**Sirius' POV**

_6__th__ year_

"I'm tired of trying to understand you, Black!" Marlene said looking mad. "Every time I give you another chance you just go and blow everything up!"

"Marlene..." I started saying.

"You know what?" She said, finally breaking down. "I don't want to hear another excuse." Tears started rolling down her cheek. "It feels like your heart is locked up, but you don't want anyone to open it. And I don't know how to deal with that, Sirius. I really don't!"

I always thought Marlene was the tough kind of girl; the one that doesn't show her feelings to anyone, the one who had strength enough to just walk away and not care. Seeing her crying like that in front of me, just made me feel really bad about everything.

"You say my heart is locked up..." I started once more.

"Yes, it is!" She interrupted me again. "And I hope you find some girl who has enough power over you to open it." She completed starting to walk away.

"Marlene, wait!" I held her wrists and pulled her closer to me. "You're that girl." And when she looked confused at me, I completed "Because you don't even need to say Alohomora to unlock my heart."

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_Well, I hope you guys are enjoying it._

_The next one will be the final chapter._

**thenewkait:** Thanks! I'm glad you liked it.

**hooked-on-degrassi:** haha... Thanks!

**Mah Judd Weasley: **Yeah... I know you love them... You made _me_ love them ;)

**narbiglarb: **Thanks! Hope you like this one too.


	3. Chapter 3

**Sirius' POV**

_7th year, Quidditch Match_

"Okay! So, we're going out there and do our best!" James said in the changing room. "We have an awesome keeper, the two best beaters and three amazing chasers! If we play like we do when we're practicing this game is going to be just fine!" He completed and smiled.

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Do I have to tell who won? Yeah, that's right! Gryffindor! And I'm very proud to say: my girlfriend was the best chaser we had out there.

"You were amazing!" I said picking Marlene up and spinning her around.

"Sirius!" She laughed.

I smiled back at her and gave her a quick peck.

"I know I am!" She said smiling. "I'm the best chaser Gryffindor ever had!"

"Wait! You're a chaser?" I asked looking totally confused.

"Yeah, Black! You know I am!" She said rolling her eyes.

"Because I was sure you were a keeper." I completed winking at her and thank Merlin no one heard me saying that.

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**James' POV**

_7th year__, N.E.W.T.s Week_

"I need some vacation!" Lily said sitting down on the couch in the common room. She looked pretty stressed.

"What's the matter?" I asked putting my arms around her shoulders. Truth to be told, I couldn't help myself but showing she was finally mine.

"The matter is that I'm tired of these exams." She said throwing her arms in the air.

"Someone needs to stress out, huh?" I asked getting closer to her and kissing her neck.

"James, don't!" She moved over to the other side of the couch.

"What?" I asked as if I did nothing.

"Don't even start, ok?" She got up and walked next to the window. "I just want the N.E.W.T.s to be over"

"Tomorrow is the last day." I said still sat on the couch.

"Thank Merlin!" She breathed out. The silence filled the room for a couple of minutes. "I could use a portkey to somewhere right now. Just to be in peace." She said walking over to me and sitting on my lap.

"You can have the portkey to my heart." I said all cheesy.

And then she laughed. Man, how I loved that sound. It always made me feel so good, so cheerful. It was like music to my ears.

"Oh my God, James! You're so corny!" She managed to say after a few moments.

"Yeah, I know." I said shrugging my shoulders. "What can I do? It's my charm and you love it."

She smiled and leaned over to kiss me.

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**Sirius' POV**

_7__th__ yeah, N.E.W.T.s last day_

"And it's finally over!" I breathed out and dropped down on the couch.

"No one should go through this!" James completed sitting by my side.

"Oh, come on!" Remus said sitting on the chair in front of us. "It wasn't that bad."

I looked at him doubtfully.

"No, it was worse!"

"Didn't go well in your practical test, Sirius?" Lily said walking in the room followed by Marlene.

"Oh, you know so little, Lily." I said too lazy to look up at her. "The practical thing is not the real problem. I can do it just fine. Which reminds me: Babe, interested in making some magic together? My wand is at the ready." I finished and grinned at Marlene.

The room filled with laughs and I could see Marlene's cheek in a deep colour of red.

"Sirius!" She hissed.

"What?" I acted nonchalantly.

She rolled her eyes and marched over me, leaned in giving the impression she was going to kiss me and smacked my head.

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**Lily's POV**

_Honeymoon_

"Oh, James! This is perfect!" I said looking around the little cottage James, my husband (I still couldn't believe it!), had rented for us to spend that week.

"I'm glad you liked it." He said grabbing my hand and spinning me around. "You know I'd do anything for you."

* * *

"Wow!" Was all I could say as James pushed himself off of me and lay by my said.

"I know." He said trying to catch his breath. "I may not be an animagus, but I sure can be an animal."

And then I started laughing. You can always count on James to ruin a moment with comments like this.

After I calmed myself down I started thinking.

"James?" I called.

"Huh?"

"But you _are _an animagus." I said matter-of-factly.

"Way to cut my thunder, Lils!" He said looking like a little kid whose ice-cream had been just taken away.

I smiled at him. I was sure I'd have a eventful life with him.

* * *

_And here's the final chapter!_

_Thank you so much for wasting your time and read this, when you all could be reading funnier fictions, but hey, I did my best. _

_Anyway, hope you liked it._

_And I must say: It was quite fun to write it. If anyone else has any other pick up line, just tell me and I'll try to write it, okay?_

_My favourite one was the first one on chapter 2. I think it was pretty fun._

_Tell me your favourite one, ok?_

**Jokegirl:** Oh... It wasn't really on Hiatus, because it's been less than one month I put it on Hiatus, so you really shouldn't trust everything I say... xD

**thenewkait: **Aw, thank you! Hope you liked this one too.

**TeamDean79: **I know, right? They're just the best! And here it is!


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